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AND THEN WE’LL DO IT AGAIN.

Friday, November 27, 2009

Alternative Endings To The Play Julius Caesar By William Shakespeare Which I Came Up With While Waiting For The !@#$%^&* Movie To Stop Lagging.

1. Instead of plotting to kill Caesar, Cassius thinks, “What the hell is this country coming to?!” and emigrates to Australia.

2. Mark Antony runs off with Calphurnia. After all, he has been allowed to touch her. Solves the problem of the paranoid wife and the bent-on-revenge successor.

3. Caesar oversleeps; doesn’t make it to the capital in time; has to stand outside the discipline room for two periods. the Senate thinks, “What the hell? We don’t want a tardy Emperor.” And they crown Cinna the Poet instead.

4. A second servant comes back in and says, “Aaaah wait a minute my Lord. We found the heart of the beast. Apparently what we were looking at was its gall bladder. So everything’s okay. You can go to the Senate.”

5. Artemidorus begs Caesar to read his letter and Caesar goes, “Eh? Something about me? Gimme! IwannaseeIwannasee!”

6. As Caska goes to stab Caesar, he trips on his own robe and stabs Cassius instead. Thankful for killing the man he fears, Caesar rewards Caska and calls him “the most noble Roman of all”.

7. Cassius sees Titinius enclosed by rejoicing men on the battlefield. They are actually cheering, because they have won, but Cassius misinterprets it and thinks that they are enemies who have captured Titinius, meaning they have lost the war. Without even double checking he kills himself. Wait no, this really was how it ended. Yes, it was that ridiculous. Worse than Romeo and Juliet, I tell you.

8. The ghost of Caesar enters Brutus’s tent and tells him, “Actually, I’ve got the Philosopher’s Stone. You can’t touch me. Avada Kedavra!!!”

9. …

Shakespeare must be turning in his grave right now. (:

HOP ON THE DECK AND FLOP LIKE A FISH!

Sunday, November 22, 2009

More light relief.

IF NAUTICAL NONSENSE BE SOMETHING YOU WISH…

Saturday, November 21, 2009

If any of you are cursing yourselves for mucking up your SPMs so far, allow me to cheer you up by telling me about my BM essay paper.

(And if you’ve been on facebook, it’s the same story. I can’t decide whether to cry or laugh over it, but at this moment I feel like doing the latter. :] That and I think everyone needs some light relief.)

I’d written this fantastically long and (in my then opinion) awezum essay on kesan-kesan pemanasan global. I used a lot of canggih words like memaslahatkan and mutakhir ini, blah blah blah. I really pulled out all of Pn Phang’s stops. I was feeling really good cause I’d prepared stuff for this essay and I’d written a similar one before.

And I thought it would really prove my smarts if I wrote about recent events I’d read about in the newspapers. So I wrote about that swarm of oversized jellyfish that are messing up the fishermen’s livelihood. And I was right damn proud of myself for thinking of it. I was pretty sure I’d done well.

KENDATIPUN BEGITU, I found out yesterday that jellyfish in Malay is “obor-obor”. Which, prior to Karluis telling me about it, I didn’t know.

I had written it as “ikan agar-agar”.

So my examiner is going to be reading a half-page-long paragraph about how a swarm of “ikan agar-agar gergasi” have been terrorizing the fishermen of Japan and making them want to quit fishing because they have been eating all the other fish in the sea.

Oh tuhanku. D:

I haven’t had the guts to tell my BM tuition teacher yet!!!

SAY HELLO TO THE END OF THE WORLD.

Wednesday, November 18, 2009

This is a few hours late, but anyway:

GER-O-NI-MO!

PS: BM – ~~owned. (:~~

edit. Kononnya owned. See facebook. I feel fuh-reaking blonde. Hopefully my examiner has a sense of humour.

I KNOW WHAT’S HAPPENING HERE.

Sunday, November 15, 2009

So I’ve been on my longest hiatus ever, RIGHT?

The com’s been cold and lonely all week, RIGHT??

And I’ve been doing nothing but swotting up on history, RIGHT??!

WRONG!

*TOOOT* you lose!

I HAVE been coming online. Just not updating the blog.

AND DON’T PRETEND THAT YOU HAVEN’T BEEN

DOING THAT EITHER.

Because every day when I log in to facebook, walao A. The number of form 5s who are online is ~~astonishing~~ mind-blasting. We’re not really updating our statuses, in the hope that people will think that we’ve got awezum self-control to resist the irresistible call of the World Wide Web.

But DON’T BE FOOLED!

If you actually bother to click on people’s pages, you can see that they’re still buying and selling friends, getting high scores in typing games, and playing MAFIA WARS.

=_____________=”

It’s true I tell you. And at least I got the guts to admit that my willpower is slush. Well, me and Jing Wei. She’s the only one I can see who’s consistently blogging. Atta girl!

SOOOO fellow pejuang SPM, if you’re online these few days and you happen to be reading this, I dare you to leave a message in my chatbox to prove that you’ve been here.

There is NO SHAME in succumbing to the net! This is the age of science and technology and we should be embracing it!!! :D

And don’t try to pretend that you’re not here either. I can see the hits going up.

*And you know my hits don’t lie (;*

But before you say anything, I HAVE been studying. And though history is actually really interesting if you take the time to get to know it, it’s really still just a vague swooshy mush in my head. Like Hock Eu said, “Actually we know all the facts one. They’re just all jumbled up and disorganized in our heads.”

Interpreted by me, it means, “We’ll be able to get though paper 1, but paper 2 is probably going to kill us.”

It is now 3 days to the SPM.

Remember way back when it was 300? And then it was 30. And now THIS. The weird thing is I was more panicky at 30 days than now.

~~Because I STUDIED! NYAHA :D~~

And besides learning the names of the Prophet’s wives and his successors, the glory of the Islamic Empire, about Spartans and Greeks and the difference between Zimmi, Mozarab, Modejar (I think), Zakat, Jizyah and Mawali, I think the number one thing I’ve learnt in the past few days is:

STUDY GROUPS DON’T

WORK.

Discussion groups do.

Meaning that you have to study beforehand, then meet up to discuss. Because

1. The discussion will help it stick in your brain. Seriously. It does.

2. You absolutely can’t study with friends around, because societal norms dictate that we absolutely MUST talk when you’re in company, because if not it just feels awkward. (And I have thought about the ridiculousness of this fact. But we can think about it properly after the SPM lah.)

3. If you don’t study before you come for the study group and you’re hanging around people who have already studied, you end up feeling like an idiot as they smoothly spout historical factlets.

Okay lah, a bit late to be telling you all this.

But now you know. (:

Now be a good person, leave a message and go study.

Or you could just pretend that this is a whole plot by me in order to make my chatbox not look so dead, and ignore it and go study, screw the hits.

Either way, I’m still a genius. (:

One last thing:

SPM ONLY MAAAH. :D

Okay BYE.

NOTHING REALLY EVER GOES THE WAY YOU EXPECT!!!!

Wednesday, November 4, 2009

I am not happy. I am not sad. I am not feeling nostalgic or wistful or any of those things associated with graduation from high school, the end of the 5 most important years of your life. I am just… Freaking pissed off!

What a waste of yesterday’s words.

Some idiot let off a firecracker right outside 5S5, immediately after assembly. As a result, 5S5, 5S6 and 5S7 all kena spotcheck! They took away my handphone and my camera, and as a result I couldn’t take any photos for the rest of the day. Pn. Joyce also took away my very pretty ribbon ): I got my handphone and camera back later,but I had to fill in a stupid form first. SHIT lah, last day of school also still manage to kena discipline action. It completely ruined the mood for the rest of the day.

_I_ !!!

And having been through the ceremony twice already, the actual thing was dead boring. I spent most of the time wading through people to collect autographs.

Oh, and thank you Ed Boarders, and Sean. (: I feel good!

Okay here go whatever pictures I have, since I have serious doubt in the capability of FaceBook to get the pictures up correct.

Last few days of high school

Work on class T-shirt:

Two weeks later… TA-DAHHH!

(: Don’t tell Shanti okay?

4th November 2009 – Graduation of CHS Class ‘09

Note: I’m gonna keep adding photos to this post as the rest of you upload them okay. (:

Seconds after the picture above was taken, Pn. Lim Ser Kian stormed in and ordered a spotcheck. By the time I got my camera back, I had already graduated!